There are more singles today in the developed world than ever before. This is due to hectic lifestyles, greater independence, and a shift in values. Whether you chose to be single or not, there are many reasons to celebrate the single life.
Why you should celebrate the single life
1. Space to grow
Though we are wired to yearn for companionship, your happiness should not depend on having someone else in your life. If you cannot be happy as a single, it is unlikely you’ll be happy in a relationship. You’ll expect your partner to somehow make you happy, and this unrealistic expectation is a set-up for failure.
Use your time as a single to become a better person. Learn to feel comfortable with yourself and to contribute to society. When you are secure in yourself and your role in the world, you’ll bring more joy to future relationships. And if you do not end up in a relationship, you’ll feel happy and fulfilled anyway because you’ve lived well.
2. Many more freedoms
As a single, you make all the decisions in your life: How to spend money, what to wear, where to go, what job to take. It’s easier to sleep through the night without a snoring partner or crying baby. You can take a vacation anytime instead of co-ordinating busy schedules. And you can date whoever you want to – enough said.
3. A change to form good habits
When two people try to merge their separate lifestyles into one, there are going to be some challenges. You’ll have to adjust to the other person’s preferences and routines. If you don’t have good habits by then, you’ll most likely adopt the other person’s. Take this time while you’re alone to establish good habits that will be strong enough to remain part of your life when you are in a relationship later.
4. You’ll meet more people
Sometimes the reason you’re single is that you’ve always gone out with the same type in the past, and that type could be all wrong for you. Start dating widely. Write down three things that you simply will not tolerate in a person. Then, if someone asks you out and does not trigger anything in that list, say yes. Remember that you’re going to meet them just this once, not marry them.
The best attitude to take to a date is that this will be a one-off meeting, just to have a fun time out instead of sitting at home. Most dates will work out to be one-offs. That’s great, because then you’ll get to meet lots of people and figure out what you really want. It’s part of your preparation for a relationship with a real person later.
Celebrate the single life, even in a relationship
Dating widely is optional. Learning to be happy with yourself and by yourself is not. Remember that even in a marriage, you will often be on your own while your spouse works or attends to other personal obligations. A good relationship is made up of two whole and happy individuals, not two incomplete and needy ones.
So celebrate the single life, whether you’re single or not, for the rest of your life.
“Let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous,
but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone
though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress
grow not in each other’s shadow.”
– Kahlil Gibran