Get Over It: It’s Really Not About You

A baby thinks only about itself. It cries when it’s hungry or when it doesn’t get what it wants. Some of us never stop being babies, even when we’re middle-aged. We still think the world revolves around us. I’ve fallen into that trap. And sometimes there’s no pleasant way to say what needs to be said: Get over it.

Why you need to get over it

1. Most of the world is not thinking about you

I once read that whatever problems you have, billions of people don’t care. The whole world, with the exception of just one person, is made up of other people. That’s roughly 6 billion people who don’t really care about you because they’re busy thinking about themselves, just like you are. That sounds harsh, but it puts our little problems into some perspective. There are millions of people with bigger problems.

2. Nobody intentionally hurts another

Often we simmer over the words or actions of someone who never intended to hurt us. You may have offended someone before without intending to, and was surprised at the negative reaction to your words or actions. You never meant it that way, and wonder why people are so sensitive. Well, sometimes we are the sensitive party.

Even if someone deliberately hurts you, remember that they are probably lashing out in their own pain. It’s not about you, it’s about them. So let it go. Be a bigger person.

3. You control nothing but yourself

You have no right to demand that another person acts or speaks a certain way. People are who they are. And even if someone tries to change because they love you or are afraid of you, this won’t last. There is only one person you can change, and that is you. You can choose to rise above, to be better. In fact, the ONLY thing you have real control over is your thinking. If you change your thinking, you can change your life.

4. Your unhappiness is your fault

Ouch, it hurts to hear this. It’s easy to blame circumstances and other people for your unhappiness. But if you are unhappy, it’s because you choose to be unhappy. Make a decision now to be happy. Look in the mirror and smile, or smile at someone else. Act as if you are happy.  Write down all your blessings in life. You don’t have to, of course, but don’t blame your unhappiness on anyone else.

It’s not about you, so get over it

If you’re thoroughly offended by this post and upset with me by now, here’s something that should make you feel better. This post was not about you. It’s about me. I was in a funk today and needed to tell this to myself. But if it helps you, all the better. And if you found it a waste of time, well get over it 😉

Okay okay, I’ll be nice now. For a more serious approach to overcoming your problems, read Get Over It: Thought Therapy for Healing the Hard Stuff. Or try these 10 things that make people happy.